I may edit this a bit more later, I was talking on Instant Message with a friend when I realized it would make a good blog entry. I love my wife dearly but sometimes she goes a bit overboard in her quest for adventure. The weird format is a result of the Instant Message format which would have taken a long time to edit. So here it is in the raw.

so my wife wants to go to a trip on the other side of the island

we have 2 days left

the other side is the rainy side

so I am not crazy about it but it is a rainforest

ultimately I know that not going would put me in the doghouse

so I go

we agree to a compromise and the first place we go sucked bigtime

and one of my kids gets physically sick

my wife is trying to put a smile on everything but the reality is that no one is having a good time and besides we could be boogie boarding

she agrees it is best to head back

but on the way there is a spot a lot of cars are at, she wants me to turn back but I resist

she is persistent in a way that I know is not good for me

so I turn back

we get out the car and a windshield was broken recently and there is a sign that says ” do not leave valuable in your car”, she actually has to warn my oldest to not step in the vandalized grass.

I am once again resisting

then I see that we have to climb over barbed wire to get where we are going

and on the other side of the barbed wire is a BIG dead decomposing animal

Flabbergasted Instant Message Friend: lolwtf

me: as we cover up our mouth as to not inhale the dead decomposing stench we are sliding down a muddy path

on the path is a bamboo jungle, so that is cool

you can hear a waterfall in the background

as we go to where the waterfall is there is a steep embankment

we all have sandals on and my wife wants to go down, I have finally had enough and I protest appealing to here motherly instincts, she is not deterred

I don’t feel my sandals are safe so I throw them down the hill and climb down barefoot, which was the only protest I could think of at the time, so I can catch my falling children

my wife won’t look me in the eye because she knows I am judging her

we come upon a ditch

with slippery rocks, all of the people coming up to the ditch have hiking boots on (and they are occasionally slipping), we have on sandals

I threaten to call child protection and that makes an impression on her

we won’t be risking life and limb for a waterfall

Flabbergasted Instant Message Friend: haha

me: but we still need to head back up and luckily as we past the decomposing warthog or whatever the hell it was

Bobby: the girls want to turn back?

me: we see that our car was left alone by the vandals

the girls did not want to go back

one of the funnier parts of the story

is that my girls were cheering on their mom for being a bad parent

concluding that bad parents are the best because they let you do stuff good parents won’t

Flabbergasted Instant Message Friend: lol

me: do you mind if I post this verbatim in my blog?

too much writing and too good of a story to not do that

Flabbergasted Instant Message Friend: Hi Mom

me: ha

i can probably edit this

Flabbergasted Instant Message Friend: oh I see how it is

just change my name to Patrick.Antonius@gmail.com or something

that’ll get em excited